I’ve been out of the blogging fray, but have seen the fringes of it and some of the impacts/effects it’s had on people I have come to care deeply about from the blogging community.
There are a number of bloggers who I am getting to know in other social media forums and partially based on some of those interactions, I’ve made a choice to avoid reading some of their blogs because I have enough drama, trauma, and conflict, in my personal life to willingly choose to engage in it online.
I generally find myself at odds with people I respect and care about because I am in the unique and minority position of being the “victim with a bleeding heart for her abuser.” There’s a diagnosis called “Stockholm Syndrome” which means that this is considered to be an abnormal coping mechanism which develops into a maladaptive mental health condition where the victim can identify with the perpetrator to the point that he or she can then turn into a perpetrator on the guidance and behalf of the one they’ve been captivated and abused by. At least that’s my understanding of what that means.
Perhaps that is a maladaptive coping mechanism for me. But, what I can say at this point is that I agree with Cate –
“many people they hold in their heads the idea that there are a some people who don’t deserve compassion. “They’re not human beings, they’re monsters“. I struggle with that one because I believe that those ‘monsters‘ (a human being is never a monster in my mind) are simply people who have been on a different journey. And who am I to judge someone else’s journey?”
Responding to hatefullness with hatefullness only spreads hate.
If we want a better future for ourselves, our children, and our world, we have to learn to move through our pain filled experiences of the past with other people and recognize that someone has to start responding to the unforgivable with forgiveness, the unacceptable with acceptance, and the unlovable with love because to continue to take an eye for an eye leaves everybody blind, an arm for an arm leaves everyone maimed, and the scorched earth policies of the victors defeats us all.