Leave space


I’ve gotten going again regarding my physical health this past week.

Monday I exercised by cleaning my apartment. I try to do it a couple of times a month, whether I feel like it or not. Eventually I aspire to do it once a week, then daily.

Tuesday, after Luna went to her respite care program I ventured to the public pool. I absentmindedly forgot my swimsuit. Perhaps a part of me was less than motivated to continue exercising?

Wednesday, at 5:30 a.m., I went back for the suit and did 40 minutes of deep water aerobics. I got educated about “black girl problems” when I acquainted myself with other early morning water birds and engaged in conversation with a young woman about why it was her first and probably last water aerobics class. She was inspiring and funny, open and friendly. She’s literally worked her butt (and other parts) off and has lost 50 lbs, with a goal of 50 more.

Thursday I grabbed my new iPod and ventured out into the world with my purple headphones on and be-bopping down the street. If not for the music lending me healing energy and motivation, I could easily have cancelled my plans for the day. Plans which included my final session with the therapist and meeting a friend for lunch, as well as getting groceries we desperately needed. That evening I attended my first personal/professional development webinar. By the end of the day I had dance walked over two miles, formulated a transition plan, and helped a friend.

Yesterday I went to the pool again. I swam 600 yards and then spent an hour or more interacting, discussing, and debating life, the universe, and everything. When I got home I quickly showered, fixed a smoothie, and got Luna out the door so fast her hair didn’t get brushed. We missed the bus and my app indicated it was more than a 30 minute wait for the next one.

I was so tired and really starting to hurt. The insomnia got really bad this week and I’d probably slept less than 15 hours total for the week and pushed through two days of a full-body migraine. To top it off we were going to a place I’ve never been to in a distant part of town I had never actually been in. Factor in that I’m the person who prefers to be early or on-time and abhors being more than five minutes late to anything and it would have been so very easy to just call and cancel.

Instead, Luna and I walked to the next stop, where I checked the next scheduled arrival. It was less than five minutes. So, we didn’t have a 40 minute wait after all.

After getting on the bus, I used a feature on the app to set a proximity alarm when we were 1/3 of a mile away from our destination stop. For some reason, it didn’t go off. After a while Zi asked the driver if we had passed the stop. We had passed it several minutes previously, meaning more than a mile back, in unfamiliar territory.

We got off at the next street and crossed over to wait for a bus going back in the other direction. The app said it was a nine minute wait. Since there wasn’t a bench to sit on, a shelter to stay dry against the darkening clouds indicated was on its way, and was too close to the street for my comfort with Luna’s busyness, we walked to the next stop.

While there, we encountered a young man who is in his last year of college, studying dance. I told him about some local connections for artists and entertainers seeking exposure and connection & collaboration with others. I asked if he knew the stop we needed. He did and helped to make sure we didn’t pass it again.

Once we arrived and connected with our hostess, I was so very exhausted, in pain, and slow moving, I was much less interactive than I wanted to be.

It was an indoor play park at a newer parks and recreation facility. Much nicer and well attended than the one next to where we live. There was a plastic rock climbing play structure Luna spent most of her time climbing.


At one point she acted as if she was scared of climbing down and I utilized the coaching skills identified in the webinar to teach her how to get herself down using the hand and footholds.

I saw the counselor from Luna’s Early Head Start Program, unexpectedly. So, I went over to her and we touched base about how thing have gone for us since Luna transitioned out of the program last August. She has information about an eight week therapeutic group that delves into attachment issues I might qualify to attend. She’s going to mail me the information.

There were many things that didn’t happen as planned this week. Several of those things triggered emotions and initial responses that have immobilized and derailed me in the past. However, because I’ve done a lot of healing and recovery work regarding acceptance, powerlessness, control, and unmet expectations, I was able to push past and move through them.

Doing this work to shift my perspective and be open to the opportunities and possibilities that are frequently disguised as unexpected barriers and unplanned encounters, has brought me to the point where I was able to go through this week with presence, intention, and enjoy my Divinely scheduled meetings with others.



    1. Paralaxvu,
      Thank you for that. Glad that others receive inspiration from here.

      It’s been a long time since we’ve connected. I’m glad you visited. I’m afraid that I’ve gotten so busy I keep forgetting to visit my “old” blogging friends, such as yourself.

      Now, just to get consistent with the things stated herein. lol. It seems the only consistency I can establish is how inconsistently I get things done.



    1. Kathy,
      Thank you. It’s been a long journey. I still have a ways to go, especially around self-perception because being behind the curve and in back of the pack have been part of my self identity for so long. Process and progress, it’s not an event.

      I appreciate you stopping by and commenting.



    1. Robert,
      So glad you found your way here. It was a busy week and par for the course for life with a pre-schooler as a SAHM who is a single parent of sorts four+ weeks at a time. I appreciate you visiting and commenting.



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